Paradise Philippines

experienced a lot of "first" with my switart.

* after four years of being classmates, we spent our first overnight together over at kuya reagan's house. we all know why we haven't been together at those well-known overnights. or at any class project/outing for that matter. herher.

* we fell asleep holding hands (o diba ala San Cai at Hua Tze Lei). a first for me.

* i fell asleep facing him. embracing him. another first for me.

* we went to mass together. our first as a couple. and good timing too. today was the feast day of the Holy Rosary. aren't we just blessed or what (nye nag feeling eh).

* first time we ate dinner and breakfast together with Tel, Fu, Kuya Reags (duh), and the classmate who does not want to be mentioned in my blog. (we usually each lunch or snacks together)

* had loads and loads of fun playacting (we pretended we were housemates in the Big Brother house and taped confessions and all).

* laughed and laughed and fooled around, playing UFC with each other (we taped the whole thing of course). aren't we fun?

* took loads of pics. (erm, this is not exactly a first. i just wanted to include it. herherher)

it was cool, but also kind of sad, because we got together just when we are about to graduate (hopefully. Lit Crit's standing in our way). i couldn't help thinking of the time we missed, times when we should've had fun like we do everytime we're together (and sometimes, even when we're apart). but never mind.

we're together now.

stressed out nako! hell week is here. and it really lived up to its label. hell is what we're all in right now.

of course, here i am blogging when i have a thousand things to do. bad Camz. bad, bad Camz.

happy birthday hanney!

understanding brings knowledge, and knowledge is power.

or so they say.

i know more about the situation than you think i do. so if you think that i'm some kind of clueless idiot who has no idea of what the real deal is, well.

you are definitely in for a surprise.

gusto niyo bang pumayat? try nyo maging (graduating) student ng journ. instant diet yan. pramis.

sa buong buhay ko, ngayon lang ako nawalan ng oras mag internet. noon, kahit exams na, blog parin. walang exam exam. ganyan kalupit si Camz. wehe. milagro nga at kahit minsan hindi pa ako bumagsak.

ngayon ko lang rin naranasan ang hindi matulog ng sunod sunod na araw. ay grabe. kamusta naman ang pimples ko? tumataginting na sila ngayon.

LAYOUT is something i've become associated with. so it wasn't really a surprise when i asked BA for my assignment and he said "ikaw sa layout ka". yun yon eh. wehehe.

at first i was kind of relieved that i didn't have to go to places for interviews and i didn't have to rack my mind for yet another article, but by the time i was doing the layout in the wee hours of the morning, i wished i just asked for a writing assignment instead. matrabaho talaga pag layout, hay grabe. another thing that i was worried about is that what if my groupmates didn't like my job, but i was determined not to let them down so i did my best. spent all night layouting our magazine for Filipino with BA ang my swit, we let Kuya Reagan sleep even if he told us specifically to wake him up. hehe.

sobrang pagod. but i was pleased coz my groupmates liked my work. hanney was right. it feels good to be appreciated. kahit na 2 seconds ko lang nasilayan yung printed copy nung mag namin, k parin. wlang kasing sayang marinig na nagustuhan nila.

tapos, overnight ulit ng tuesday. layout naman ng sportsjourn. thanks to hanney and tel for helping me. and to fu and arjay for keeping us all awake. da best kayo. sensya na, antok na kasi talaga ko kaya di na ko masyado nakasali sa kulitan. saka kung mejo masungit na. hehe.

tapos dagdag pa sa pasakit yung LIT CRIT. bad trip. 8 hours ang exam namin dun. at hinarap ko ang ala-horror na mga tanong ng prof namin. katakot sa hirap eh. nag test ako sa Lit Crit ng 2 hours lang ang tulog. milagro na lang kung pumasa pa ko dun. lalo na may personal na galit sa section namin yung prof namin.

miraculously, 1.75 kami sa thesis. kahit di natapos yung chapter 5. based nalang daw dun sa first draft. bait ng prof namin. ngayon, lit crit nalang talaga probelema.

napanood na namin ni switart yung corpse bride. ganda ng effects, sobra. da best.

my fave line: "could a heart still break, after it has stopped beating?"

BAKASYON NA! hapi bekeysyon to all!

tel, fu, hanney, alabyu ol! mwah!

jhoey, miss na kita, aambushin kita sa bahay nyo!

meri, ang kyut mo sa TV!

switart, alabshu! mwa!

nakakaaliw naman to:

astig ah.

nabad trip ako kay Imang kagabi.

magdemand daw ba ng milagro? eh kumusta naman, yun ngang gumanda siya eh milagro na yun no. at ang nakakatawa pa, eh talagang umulan para hindi masunog yung mga nanay madre nya. kabarberohan amp. ganun kalakas si Imang kay God.

not that i don't believe in miracles, i do. i just didn't like the way they presented the whole scene. to me, it sounde like Imang was threatening God to help her or else. which is not a good thing to show to viewers. it seemed to me that they were using miracles to help their story flow, thus, better ratings. gah.

or maybe i'm just taking it all too seriously. whatever.

mahaba kaya, eto tinago ko. kung trip mo parin basahin, ni italicize ko na yung mga parts na feeling ko totoo.

(temperament ko daw)

dagdag lang.

ngayon lang ako nakaramdaman ng matinding kamuhian sa isang tao.

i never fight back. not unless i see someone that is close to me gets hurt. then, you really would see the worst side of me. you'll see what i'm really made of.

the thought of fighting back has crossed my mind more than once. and i admit, holding back was such a challenge when the idea of slapping the stupid accusations and underhanded ways of a certain person is soooo enticing. if i wanted to, i could ruin you. especially with the things i know? imagine what i could do if i invented a few things, the way you did to me?

if not only for a few things that i'm taking into consideration, i would've lashed out at you long ago. believe me, i so wanted to.

but i won't. no matter how bitchy you become, i will just look you in the eye and stare at you head on, because unlike you, i am not as cowardly to stoop down to your level.

:: my social calendar's pretty full this semestral break. my friends are all clamoring to meet him. i guess they could sense that it's different this time. i was especially pleased with Erika, my childhood bestfriend (we've bee friends since the age of five), who knew at once, without me having to explain it, that i am truly happy. more often than not, i take her for granted, thinking that she's still tyhe same old Erika, naive and childish. she's really more of a little sister to me, although technically, she's older by one week. she should know better than anyone else, since she's the one who witnessed me flit from one boyfriend to another, twisting myself into pretzel knots trying to please guys who, though generally nice, does not deserve that kind of treatment anyway. i know she wants to hang out with us. one day, friends, one day. my body and spirit are willing, but my pocket is not.

:: i've had to make a lot of adjustments this year, what with all the rumors and conflicts that came with my decision to be with him. for basically all of my college life, i've been with my friends-- for projects, for eating, for everything. all that changed this year. i know that very few would understand. i miss my friends, crazy trips and laughs over nothing at all. i miss chloe and jhoey, and even hanne, although we're still classmates. i miss arjay and tel and fu. i know they protect me and that no matter what, they'd still be there.  and i love them for it. and the same goes for me. no matter how little time i get to spend with them, i'm still the same. i'd still kill anyone who dare try to mess with any of them although we all know they fight better than i do. hehe. *tama na, drama*

:: but i really couldn't say that there are any regrets. i spent most of my college years for my friends, for myself. now it's time to spend it with him, and to catch up on all the years we've been virtually strangers. to eat with him, laugh with him, share my secrets, keep his secrets, share stupid jokes, make up after a fight, meet his friends and family. treat him as he rightfully desreves to be treated, because he treats me way more than i deserve to be treated. *mushy mushy*

:: and you. i'm thankful that even as late as this time, we still got together. we could've completely passed each other by and went on with our lives. now, i believe hanne. everything happened for a reason. you're everything i've ever wanted.

:: and i know, in time, we'll make all our dreams come true. together, we'll make them come true.

:: i love you.

Kyle is the cutie cousin of Lo, who celebrated his first birthday last October 9 at Shakey's SM North. i met most of his relatives. ate a platefull of chicken, pizza, salad, mojos and oatmeal bar. yum. bonded with Nikki. sayang, la si Migs. wrong timing magkasakit.

pics! (opens in a new window)  click! click!

and my favorite:

don't you think we look happy?

:: malapit na kami mag 2nd mansari. batiin nyo ko, batiin! hehe. eksayted nako. sa sobrang kaeksaytedan ko, muntik ko nanamang ibigay in advance yung gift ko. nung first mansari namin, dahil eksayted ako, binigay ko yung gift ko 1 week in advance. adik. buti nalang nakapagpigil nako.

:: gusto mo bang ma stimulate ang mind mo? sige gumaya ka. adik na kami ni switart sa larong ito.

:: dahil kami ay natural na malikhain (o sadyang adik lang), nag imbento kami ni switart ng sarili naming language. yeah.

:: adik sa PBB: gusto ko ng matanggal ang plastik na si SAY. boo.

:: papasa kaya ako sa LIT CRIT?? sana naman. adik ako nung nag exam.

:: ang sarap ng maki. kahit anong uri. lalo na kung may sawsawan na kikkoman sauce at wasabi. adik na ko. napanaginipan ko na kumakain ako ng maki.

:: adik sa primetime:

Masdan kami batang kulang sa pagtingin Kalinga ang hanap hindi makita pa rin
Pag ibig lamang ang aming hiling
Bakit pinagdamot mga bagay na naisin
Kaya nangangarap na lamang ng gising
Na sana'y marating

Mga munting pangarap namin ay
Maging abot kamay
At sana'y marating namin

Mga anghel kaming walang langit
Dinggin aming hiling
Ang aming panalangin
Sa bukas namin
Ano ang gagawin?
Sana'y marating
Ang hanap naming langit

Anghel na walang langit..

*yung mga naka bold, yun lang ang kaya naming kantahin ni mommy. yun lang alam namin eh. wehe.

:: adik ako sa pics. gusto niyo ng proof? sige maghanda kayo. pag naibigay na sakin yung cd. bwahahaha:

:: alabyu mga adik!

:: alabyu switart! oo na, oo na, adik nako sa pag i love you.

[[pahabol]]

madalas akong mabad trip nitong mga nakaraang linggo. pero, nagkasundo na kami ni Lo na hindi na kami magpapaapekto sa kababawan ng ibang adik na manadya. saka, tulad ng sabi ni Mitch, bahala na si God sa kanya. kaya isinusupa ko na whatever na lang ang reaksyon ko, kahit ano pang mangyari. hehe.

:: i'm so damn happy i've got such a kick-ass boyfriend who never leaves me hanging. as mushy as this may sound, all those years i've sent with losers, all the nights i cried myself to sleep wishing for The One, do i really need to say that the wait was well worth it? gah. his is what happens when i'm happy. my words turn sickly sweet and vomit-inducing. my apologies.

:: i remember an old old episode of Charmed wherein Piper was given a book as a birthday present or something by his boyfriend, and her sisters "commiserated" with her. i guess, it is kind of irritating to be given a book, especially by a boyfriend, when you don't really like to read. but for me, and you can ask anyone who knows me well, books really are the way to go. it's the only thing i'm addicted to, after all. thanks for your gift, sweetheart. i'm gonna devour it later. herher.

:: i can't wait to go to Bulacan and go to Jhoey's. i'm in major need of some girl bonding sessions. Antot, sama ka? text text na alng.

:: my mom and i were apalled at the tactics "President" GMA is pulling. this is how ur conversation went:

mommy: prinomote nya yung mga pulis na nasugatan
camz: oo. nagpapabango ng pangalan. galing rin neto eh
mommy: nye, edi lahat nalang ng pulis mag papasugat na lang.
camz: ....ahahahhaha
mommy: diba?
camz: wah, onga, pag may rally, susugatan nila sarili nila, waha

:: i was watching PBB last night, and Phoemela kept coming on screen, giving updates about how dove isa celebrating "real" beauty. you might remember that Dove is the soap commecial i was harping on about a few entries back, annoyed at its stupid forever-young concept? real beauty my ass.

:: i wanna edit my blog and my friendster so badly. come tuesday, and i swear i will get started. including Arjay's long overdue layout.

:: of course, how could i forget? i love you. happy second monthsary! mwa!

yan ang sabi ni Nora Aunor.

ang sabi ko naman, akala mo lang wala, pero MERON MERON MERON!

waahha baduy.

GOOD NEWS #1: pumasa ako sa Lit Crit. yeba! kung inyong matatandaan, ang Lit Crit ay ang 8-hour long exam namin, na kinuha ko ng walang kahit isang handout na nabasa at 2 hours lang ang tulog. kundi himala ang tawag sa aking pagkapasa, hindi ko alam kung ano. haha, haha. kay bait talaga ni Papa God at Papa Jesus. pumasa rin si switart.

GOOD NEWS #2: at di lang siya basta pumasa, DL ulit siya. wahaha. CAMZ--> PROUD GF. may tres pa sya nun. jusmiyo, halimaw ang boypren ko!

GOOD NEWS #3: at marunong na siyang magyoyo. nituruan ko siya kahapon. kumpleto na ang boyhood ni switart, icongratulate nyo naman sya. haha. trumpo naman ang susunod kong ituturo.

GOOD NEWS #4: binisita namin si Jhoeybear my labs kahapon. chika chika chuva chuva. i unloaded everything that has been bothering me this past few months, and as always, it is truly the best remedy. and gaad, how i wished that kalowibear is still here. it would've made evrything so much easier, for me and for her. it sucks when one of your closest friend is stuck in a "dead white town with dead white people" (her words, no less) in another side of the planet. my goodness.

GOOD NEWS #5: nakuha na namin yung mga pics namin, at maeedit ko na yung friendster ko. yeha!

andami kong good news no? waw. babu na my dir prens. mageedit nako ng pics.

in all of my academic years, i must admit that this is the first time i've felt disappointment with regards to my grades.

admittedly, i never really study. sure, i read a bit but my very very short attention span often makes me turn away after not more than a few pages. i don't even buy the books the professors assign us. i always think that i'll never read it anyway so what's the use. i've always been happy with a passing grade, my reason being that it was actually more than what i deserve, since i never study.

but i was fucking .23 away from being a Dean's Lister this semester. if i studied just a little i would have made it. i really wanted to make him proud, but well i guess, i have another semester to go.

my mom was really cool about it. i told her i almost made it, and she didn't even scold me. haha. my mom's really the best. she knows that if she persisted, she would only push me into further stagnancy. or maybe she just gave up on me after all the years i never listened to her. haha. whatever.

if only i studied just a little bit in taxation. the lit grade was expected. a all of my grades are more than satisfactory (except for LRT, LIT, and JRN 213). i'm so frustrated.

mag aaral na talaga ko pramis. pramis. pramis. pramis.